I recently sat at breakfast with three friends, getting caught up on life and sharing prayer requests. As the conversation developed, all three shared the same sad experience of grown children cutting off contact, extending even to grandchildren. That breakfast was not an exception. I hear from many people walking through the same experience.
A 2025 YouGov survey found that 38% of U.S. adults are estranged from at least one family member, including siblings, parents, children or grandparents. A recent Fox News story covered the phenomenon, in particular, children “cutting-off” contact with parents. Some of this happens over political and value differences, social media influence, communication breakdown, or other outside influences.
But a subject of particular concern is people ending a family relationship, calling it “toxic,” or needed for their mental health. As Dr. Richard Blake said in the article above, “there is this huge bias that if you're struggling in your adult life, it must be because your parents did something they shouldn't or didn't do something.” Let’s start by eliminating some obvious, false arguments. Every person, including parents, makes mistakes.
We are all products of our environment and shared cultural values and thinking. If someone sees things differently, it does not mean they are wrong. Differences are part of the human experience, where we can learn from each other, understand perspectives, and grow in love. There will always be necessary boundaries; a parent or child who is drug-addicted is not the right choice to babysit. There may be relationships that pose physical dangers.
These situations have to be addressed with wisdom. But severing all contact over something like “emotional wellbeing” will usually backfire. Wellbeing comes instead from obeying God’s Word, in a life rich with forgiveness, kindness, long-suffering, and love for others.